10 Things Every Birth Mother Wants Adoptive Parents to Know
You may be wondering what a birth mother is experiencing while making an adoption plan or going through the adoption process. We did some research and found a list created by Patricia Dischler, author, speaker, child care professional and birth mother. She wrote the following list titled, “10 Things Every Birth Mother Wants Adoptive Parents to Know.”
I did not place my child because she was “unwanted.” I wanted her so much that I continued a pregnancy filled with unanswered questions.
I chose adoption because I loved my child. This parental love allowed me to put his needs before my own when making my choice.
This choice affected more than just me. She has a Grandmother, a Grandfather, and Aunts and Uncles who love her as well, and she will be missed.
I wish for the day I can look into my child’s eyes and tell him I love him one more time.
I hope that you will teach my child about her beginnings – about where she was born and who I am.
I hope you will teach respect to my child by showing respect for me in your discussions.
I wish I could be there to answer my child’s questions about adoption, but I trust you to answer them truthfully as best you can.
I will never stop thinking about my child. She will always be a part of who I am.
I would never try to disrupt my child’s new family with you. I put too much emotion and suffering into making this choice to allow anything to disrupt it – including me.
In my eyes, you will always be my child’s Mom and Dad. And that thought brings me happiness.
These thoughts are echoed by many of the birth mothers we have worked with. On the other side of the process, this list can provide some insight and/or some points to start a conversation for a family considering adoption.